3 surprising self-defeating patterns you may not recognize, and one is wanting enlightenment!

1. Being a nice person!

You may disagree with this. I did in my earlier years!

My spiritual teacher helped me spot my ego creating a persona of a nice person, but below the surface I was in a conditioned state of fear of being unacceptable and disliked, rather than truly being conscious of myself, others or circumstances. On some level the nice person self-concept I had created was a means of self protection, but I was also afraid that I was unlovable!

We can create a nice person persona to hide behind, but we can end up discrediting ourselves because we think we are not good enough. In fear we can get fixed and stay in that condition state, closing our hearts and trapping our minds!

The easiest way that I know to open our hearts and minds is to be sincere. Truly sincere. And when we feel truly sincere within then we will project sincerity in our attitudes and behaviors. It may not always appear nice, because we may not give a dollar to those looking for a handout or stop traffic to let another car cross over the lanes at a heavy intersection. But we will be loving, kind, and have an attitude of goodwill because sincerity opens us to our heart and the Love within.

2. Pursuing happiness.

It can be inspiring to have something to look forward to, but when it comes to desiring happiness, if we are always pursuing happiness that is all we will do – pursue. For most of us, even when we do achieve happiness, it is fleeting. We set new goals and are in desire mode again, looking for happiness. Happiness is always in the future. We don’t enjoy the moment.

This can also true of pursuing enlightenment. Until we release the mental concept of enlightenment being something in the future, something separate from our physical and mystical life now, then we will always be pursing enlightenment.

Realizing the condition of the human mind helps free us, enlightens us. The heart does. We become the observer of the thinker, bringing us out of the subconscious ego into a higher consciousness.  We  can relax in silence and release desire, desire for happiness, and even enlightenment. 

When we live in the higher aspects of our heart rather than our mind we can just Be. Be in peace. Be in Love. Be in a higher consciousness. 

3. Pushing a little too hard. 

It’s a no pain, no gain attitude! When we become ‘true’ believers in the rightness of our way, then the opposition is energized. We push, complain and protest being motivated by fear and a feeling of powerlessness. We become the cause behind the opposition!

And, in our self-righteousness we can become stuck in that energy. We end up experiencing loathing from within ourselves and from others. And, we can judge ourselves, our ideals and our spiritual journey harshly.

The Law of Polarity or duality, as the human mind perceives it, pushes back hard in the opposite direction of our desire. We humanly perceive the Law of Polarity as opposition  rather than a blending of energies and the compassion of the universe awakening us to our conditioning and concepts.

When I face opposition, I think of it as the ego’s perception of duality and that all energies blend. It is an indication that it is an opportunity to realize “I am” strong, intelligent, sincere, loving and most of all One with the Source, the Great All.

Consider taking the middle road without getting attached to any ‘one’ way. Listening to my intuition has lead me to depths and heights I never expected! In silence you can feel that your intuition it is a reflection from your heart! And, the higher energies of your heart are lead by Love.

When you want to do something harmoniously from your heart say and feel, “With the help of the Great Principle I will.”

In the hope You find Love close at hand, PortiaSLB


“Like protects like. But if we want to get rid of disharmony, then Harmony will help us.”

Eugene Fersen, Pearls of Wisdom, Teachings by Eugene Fersen, Volume I, pages 234-5.