Complain, Complain, Complain – taking it personal


We can be complainers. It’s a pattern with most of us. We see someone’s faults and we complain about them when it affects us. Unbeknownst to us however, when we complain about others faults we are aligning with the same energy we are complaining about! Complaining about them weakens us.

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Why Complain

We complain about the weather, the traffic, the government, and awful people. We’ve taken it personal!

Complaining says that we’re frustrated and feel like we’re inadequate to deal with it. Feeling powerless, we want to blame our aggravation on conditions or others and feel like a victim. We propagate reasons to  procrastinate and avoid responsibility even if we could do something.

We’re miserable and miserable to be around.

The Effects

Complaining keeps us dwelling on the negative, reinforcing it – attracting the very thing we are complaining about! 

Most of us are unconscious of how much we complain because we can make such a habit of it. We may think we are just repeating what everyone else thinks or said, that we’re just venting, or maybe we feel like it is right to complain – like it’s an observation and we’re right!  

But, like any thought, emotion or behavior, complaining is a real creative manifestation. And, therefore we are creating negative energy in our own reality! Plus, we attract more negative energy to us through the Law of Attraction. We create a less rewarding life, a less satisfying and happy one. And, eventually even our health can be adversely effected. 

The emotional energy behind the complaint is also contagious! That low-frequency energy can spread first to those close to us like our family and friends trapping them too, making them feel frustrated and even powerless. They start to complain like we do. Or, our habitual complaining can push others away, affecting our relationships and our job. 

Breaking the Habit

Fortunately, we can break the complaining habit!

1. Be Conscious/Mindful

First of all, we have to be conscious of complaining, have a positive intent to recognize that we are tempted to complain, or that we have complained! Be ‘the watcher of the thinker’ and observe unattached, without harsh judgement and taking things personal. 

2. Take Responsibility

Being conscious in that moment is when we are becoming aware of our authentic power as a soul. We are consciously taking responsibility for ourselves. 

I ask myself a simple question that I have shared before to help me recognize my true motivation: Am I coming from a place of fear or love?

3. Let it Go

When we recognize the temptation to complain or even that we have complained, then we still have the opportunity to let that thought go – to mentally step back from it. The ego may also want us to feel guilty or even hate our self, but is an illusion, because it too is only a temporary temptation and not from our true Self. 

4. Choose a Positive Motivation/Emotion

In that moment of temptation to complain we can see it as an opportunity to choose an attitude coming from love instead of fear. Our attitude is emotional power and fearful ones of complaining hold us in that energy, making us feel even more unhappy and despondent.

Calm consideration lightens our load. Kindness does. Gentleness does. Appreciation does. Respect does. Seeing the good in others helps us! We free ourselves to search for solutions.

Sometimes we really don’t have any control over things, like the weather. Then we can change our focus to gratitude! Gratitude is an emotion that opens us to abundance and creates more reasons to be grateful!

 Reality Transformation

We are far more familiar with the ego than the tenderness of our heart and inner love. Yet, when we are conscious of ourselves, our inner love, we can also be conscious of the temptation to complain without being negativity influenced by it. And, we don’t take complaints personally, or let it hurt our ego because we are centered in love.

Consider being conscious of any temptation to complain and use the steps described above for the next 3 weeks and you will have established a new brain pattern that changes your reality!

We can change our mind, our attitude and our reality! 

In the hope You find Love close at hand, Portia SLB

Related practice is: Living a Conscious Heart

“If we complain of hardships, we may have them later.”

Eugene Fersen, Aphorisms of The Lightbearer, page 53.

Your comments and insights are welcomed and appreciated! Our Higher Self never hesitates!


9 thoughts on “Complain, Complain, Complain – taking it personal

  1. This post is so inspiring – even though it is about complaining! What we complain about, remains about. 🙂

  2. Ah! Yes, we all complain a lot, but usually are unconscious of it. Being conscious of it with the intent to release it and have gratitude instead is drawing more positive energy into our life! And, I also find that it helps to see the good in others, instead of complaining about their faults – including ourselves. Thank You for sharing!

  3. I can relate – I will admit, I complain a lot and I am trying to be conscience of it in order to stop it. Thanks for a great post – I will put into place your suggestions. 🙂

  4. Oh so True!!! Anything I complain about of someone else I find myself doing the thing I complained about! So subtle is the subconscious ego that perpetuates this habit.

    Good relatable topic for everyone to look at! Conscience awareness of the problem we’ve created and help in understanding how to get rid of it! Thank You!

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